Random
by Sakura the Cookie Monster
Summary: An older Chibi-usa ponders some random thoughts. Follows HOTRS, Normal, and Peace of Mind.


TITLE: Random  
  
AUTHOR: Sakura the Cookie Monster  
  
RATING: PG-13  
  
DISCLAIMER: Standard disclaimers apply. You don't need me to repeat them to you again.  
  
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It had been an okay day at school. Kyuusuke had asked Momoko out on a date and then she asked me to come with her on a double date. Just a typical thing that fourteen year old girls would do. Except that the only person that I would even go on anything like that would be Helios. And he is somewhere in Elysian, praying for the Earth's safety and is probably, in a desperate manner, praying for himself to not get leg cramps from being on his knees twenty-four hours a day.  
  
Once I was inside Maison Apartments, I decided to use the stairs. Call me crazy, but it helps me think when I take the stairs. Even though it's twelve floors up, I'll survive. Besides, I don't like elevators. They're too unreliable when it comes for a desperate situation. And using the stairs gives me some form of exercise.  
  
My usual routine would be to head on over to Momoko's house and talk about all sorts of things, like the cutest guy in school and the teachers that were giving us a hard time. But today, I just didn't feel like it. It just felt... boring, to do all that again. Plus, with plans for a double date, Momoko is probably going to talk about guys worthy for my hand. Too bad that my heart already belongs to Helios.  
  
Recently, I've been thinking about why I had come back at all. Usually, it was Mama that would ask me to go for senshi training. This time it was different. Papa had asked me to come back here, but didn't say why. The only thing that he said was that I would figure it out on my own.  
  
Damn him and his cryptic behavior! At least Mamo-chan is easier to understand when it comes to crap like that. Papa looked like he was going to have an orgasm on the spot when he sent me here. Maybe their sex life has been bad and they sent me away to catch up on it? Nah. Papa isn't like Mama. He wouldn't send me away for a reason as stupid as that.  
  
Of course, everyone was glad to see that I was back. But, I didn't feel like being here. There were no more wars to fight, no more need for me to be here. But, the only good thing was that I could hang out with Momoko, Kyuusuke, Hotaru, and those two crazy shopping freaks, Ruruna and Naruru. Well, that and seeing my grandparents and uncle.  
  
Shingo is starting to look like the Uncle Shingo I know and love. He's now even taller than Usagi and is still growing. It seems that the men in my family grow like weeds out of control. And plus, he had just recently began shaving, using the kind of razors with disposable heads. I think it was a Mach 3, but I'm not sure. Kenji-papa uses those disposable razors that you throw away. It, unfortunately, nicks your face all the time.  
  
Usagi waxes her legs every month. Let's just say that Usagi must be crazy to wax her legs. She must be an in-the-closet masochist for pain. Then again, Minako and I must be one ourselves, since we also wax our legs. Though, in my time, it doesn't hurt as it does in this time. In my time, the wax numbs the nerve muscles temporarily while we wax, leaving it as a painless experience.  
  
Ikuko-mama uses a Venus razor to shave her legs. So do Makoto and Rei, though Rei uses the new pink ones that have come out recently. Haruka uses a Mach 3 when it comes to shaving her legs while Michiru uses skin delapatory cream. Ami and Setsuna use the brand new Intuition. It shows how busy life can be if they're using that razor. Hotaru hasn't worried about shaving yet. Thank god.  
  
But, Mamoru has to be the most immaculately clean man I have ever known. Since as far I could remember, he's used a straight razor for his face and waxes his legs. I once read Usagi's journal and she commented that his legs wasn't the only place that he waxed. I'll just leave it at that for now, because I find it bizarre and often wonder whether he was crazy or not. He would trim his own hair to perfection whenever it was too long for him to stand. He's a perfectionist when it comes to his appearance, and not just because of his hair-removal habits. I could've sworn that I saw him filing his fingernails once while he was helping me study for a physics test. Oh well. More power to him, I suppose.  
  
Grrr... I'm rambling again. I get that from Papa. He always rambles about something that he is highly interested in. I didn't even realize that I passed the floor Mamoru lives on by three floors. Damn it. And so, I make my trip down three floors of stairs. As soon as I get on the floor that he lives on, I take my sweet time in heading for his apartment. He usually leaves a spare apartment key under the rug, so it's no problem if he was home or not. If he wasn't, then that was good. I needed some time to think by myself.  
  
And, ever since I have arrived here, I've failed to see the point on why I am here. The only thing that has happened to me was awakening a new power within me. And before you ask something like "Did I get a new henshin brooch or anything like that", the answer is no. I haven't advanced as a senshi yet. It was more of a supernatural power. Until a couple days ago, I didn't have a single clue on what it was called until I did some research.  
  
I have post cognition, the ability to see into the past. From what I read, it was a very rare gift. The only thing it's done is giving me migraines and forces me to wear gloves at all times. Just today, I found out about the time a couple of male teachers had sex in the girls' bathroom almost sixteen years ago. And one of the teachers is my current math teacher. And before you begin to pity me, I don't always see unpleasant moments of the past.  
  
The first time it had happened was after Mamoru had finished shaving. When I was younger, I had once asked him why he shaved with a straight razor. He gave me a vague answer, saying that it just felt better shaving that way. Now, at fourteen, I went to look at Mamoru's straight razor. Like I said before, it earned me my first post cognitive vision.  
  
* * *  
  
Whenever I have my visions, I feel like I'm in the room. But it feels like no one can see me. I am in his or her past as an observer, unseen by anyone else. Or at least, that's what I like to think, in my mind. I see it all in black and white, so there's no color perception or depth. It always reminded me of a silent movie.  
  
This vision took place sometime in late July of 1981 in some small house located in a quiet, unknown part of town. Come to think of it, it looked like the house was far, far away from any city. It reminded me of that one small house that Miss Honey from "Matilda" lived in. It gave a calm, peaceful feeling. I was standing right behind a grown man and his son.  
  
His son was watching his father shave with a straight razor in fascination and in awe. He looked no more than five years old and was clutching on to a stuffed teddy bear. He looked like someone Usagi would pinch their cheeks till they turn red.  
  
"Daddy?"  
  
"Hmmmm?"  
  
"Why do you do that?"  
  
"Do what?"  
  
"That, to your face."  
  
"Oh, you mean shaving?"  
  
"That's what it was called?"  
  
"Yep! Shaving is an important part of personal hygiene. I do it because I hate facial hair. When you get older, I'm going to show you how to use a straight razor. You never have to buy another one of these again. But, you do have to sharpen the blade in order for it to do a good job."  
  
"...I don't get it. But, why do you use that?"  
  
"It's called a straight razor. And I use them because they're better."  
  
"The other daddies use a different kind of razor. Yours looks like a knife."  
  
"Oh, Mamoru, someday you'll understand why straight razors are better than those cheap, disposable ones. It feels better to shave with one than with those disposable razors that your mother loves a lot."  
  
* * *  
  
Or, at least, that's what I remember of it.  
  
Once I step inside Mamoru's apartment, I quickly kick off my shoes and put on my slippers. They've become too small for me now. I'll have to ask him to get me another pair soon. Then, I head towards the kitchen and check in the cabinet for his secret stash of Pop Tarts, s'mores flavor. Once I pop them in the toaster, I grab a gallon of milk from the fridge and serve myself a small glass. I no longer have the massive appetite that I used to have, but it never hurts to indulge on a little snack now and then.  
  
It's a shame that there are no pop-tarts in the future. They're very delicious. The s'more-flavored ones are my favorite. I often ask Setsuna to bring me a box of these things. It drives her nuts to no end. Especially when she complains that she had "better things to do than to shop for me".  
  
One of my favorite visions I had took place during World War II. An old picture of a nurse caused it. I found it in a family album that Mamoru had hidden in some box along with a blanket.  
  
* * *  
  
"Are you done yet?", shouted an angry nurse to a bunch of soldiers. The soldiers were bragging about how many American soldiers they had killed. Those words pissed off the angry nurse. Her hair was wound up in a bun and her clothes were covered in blood.  
  
"Did you say something to us, ma'm?", asked their drill sergeant, glaring at the nurse the whole time.  
  
"Listen here, drill sergeant. The only thing that those little boys do is yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap," she started while moving her hands in synchronization whenever she said yap. "Just remember that us ladies here are going to be treating your wounds when you idiots accidentally shoot yourself in the foot during training!"  
  
"Ma'm, may I ask for your name?"  
  
"I am Saitou Minase, nurse in the 2nd battalion. And you?"  
  
"Saitou? Isn't that a guy's name?"  
  
"And your point is?"  
  
"Nothing... I was just wondering what kind of buffoon would name you Saitou."  
  
At that, Saitou raises her hand and slaps the soldier with enough force to knock him off his feet.  
  
"I'll have you know that I am proud of who I am, little boy. Including my name."  
  
* * *  
  
As I sit here, working on my math homework, I think about my purpose for being sent to this time once again. I felt that I was wasting my time here. Eating pop-tart s'mores while I was listening to the deafening silence of space. Glancing at the linen closet where Mamoru had hid the family album, the blanket, and the flower wreathe, I always wonder why he hid this from the world.  
  
At the Crystal Palace, he hid it in his office, which was the first place that I found the box full of his sentimental trinkets. Through my mom, I knew about five generations of Tsukino family members like the back of my hand. But, my dad's family was a total mystery. The only thing I knew was that my grandparents died when he was six. It hurts that I will never know what my relatives on my father's side were like as people.  
  
Though, from what I could assess by the letters, my grandmother sounds a lot like my own mom while my grandpa sounded like a nice guy that seemed lost. Like as though he had no sense of direction in his life.  
  
Especially with this vision that I had a couple weeks ago while I went to church. It was caused by the necklace that dad gave me just before I left.  
  
* * *  
  
"Meditating again, Tetsuya?"  
  
"...Yeah, Old Man Hino."  
  
"Hey, hey, hey! I thought I told you to quit calling me that. I'm not old and my last name isn't Hino. My name is Shugi Murasaki. Get it right or don't call me by my name at all!", the old man shouted, frustrated with his pupil. He knew that his pupil only did this to drive him nuts, but then again, he also knew that he wasn't in a joking mood when he calls him "Old Man Hino".  
  
"Sorry. Old habits die hard, I suppose," Tetsuya answered as he drew a cigarette to his lips, facing the simple, unadorned wall.  
  
"Dear boy, if you keep on meditating like that, you'll pass out from starvation. Do you want to die from hunger?"  
  
"Isn't that how the monks did it in the feudal era?"  
  
Then, Shugi lifted up his wooden sword and struck Tetsuya on the head with it. The cigarette that was in his hand had landed on the incense stick holder.  
  
"OWW!!! What the hell was that for?", asked Tetsuya, rubbing the bump that he now had on his head.  
  
"I'm saying this with love and compassion as your teacher: You are an idiot! You give me migraines, you take too long in the bathroom, and you call me "Old Man Hino" as though it was my real name. Yet, I took you in because I saw potential in you. The potential to better yourself and for you to finally figure out what to do in life," fumed Shugi, looking at his student as though he had grown an extra head, "Now, I'm going to retire to my room. I hope that you figure out what you want to do. Because, as long as you're living with me and my daughter, suicide is not an option!"  
  
And with that, Shugi left his room and went to his own, pondering on what to do with his pupil. Teaching him kendo was easy, pushing him in the right direction was going to be harder than he thought. Just before he fell asleep, he marked off the date.  
  
"Tomorrow is May 4th. Aya's birthday. I'll have that lost slacker go in town and pick up her birthday present."  
  
* * *  
  
It was disturbing to see my grandfather contemplate death rather than live a life that was false to him and his ideals in that one vision. I didn't tell Mamoru what I saw. I never did. As far as I'm concerned, what I see is to my discretion. Did my father send me here to answer my own question? The question that I've asked him over and over again. What was the question that I kept asking him, you wonder. It was this:  
  
Should I be proud of who I am and where I came from?  
  
I think I know the answer now.  
  
Thanks for sending me, Dad. You gave me an answer without telling me outright. You knew that I was a post cog and that you figured that sending me back here would give me an answer. I don't know whether it was smart of him to do so. I wouldn't try to step into his mind and find an answer. His mind is a scary place to be in. Then again, so is mom's mind.  
  
I don't know what to do. I drink the last of my glass of milk and finish the last math problem. Thanks to Ami tutoring me in my time, I no longer have difficulty in math. I no longer have difficulty in almost anything anymore. Once I get my hair out of the usual style of rabbit ear shaped and let my long hair loose, I finally decide on one thing.  
  
I will be myself. And I will try to live life as truthfully as possible. That is, if I can stop thinking for one second to say hello to Mamoru.  
  
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AUTHOR'S NOTES: This was a random piece that I couldn't figure out an end to, until recently. This takes place a few years after the end of the show. Some people tend to consider Chibi-usa as a brat. I think that she has far more insight than people give her credit for. So, I wrote this in order to get inside her mind.  
  
I called it "Random" because of all the random thoughts that came from my mind when I wrote this. 


End file.
